Wake Up Wednesday: 10.5

Good morning! It is Halloween – the last day of October; I love dressing up for Halloween, but hate the scary costumes (I know, lame). The next month is one of my favorite months because Thanksgiving is my favorite holiday.

Grab your hot coffee drink and let’s get on with Halloween.


Song of the Week:

A Million Dreams (The Greatest Showman)

-Pink

I, personally, love this song regardless of who sings it, but Pink is one of my favorite artists. This song is so inspiring. It brings a smile to my face. Check it out. She also has a rendition that she sings with her daughter Willow, you might have seen on Facebook, but if not, look it up.

What do you love on your burger?:

The best burger in my opinion is pretty simple. All I want on it is swiss cheese and mayo. That is it. No veggies, no nothing.

I love me some lettuce, tomato, pickles any other day, but if I had to pick my favorite toppings for a burger it would be those.

Bible Verse of the Week:

How many back up plans do you make for your original plan?:

I don’t usually make a back up plan at all because when I make plans, they are pretty thoroughly thought out. If I do have a back up plan, I only have one. And if I need to make more, then there are too many holes in my original plan. I would just adjust the original plan to begin with.

Quote of the Week:

Don’t be surprised if you pray for nearness to God and He sends you a trial. Nearness always requires dependence.

-Ben Stuart

 

Book of the Week:

Girl Wash Your Face

-Rachel Hollis

I just started this book and already love it. It is a necessary read for all my ladies out there. It starts with all of the lies that we believe about ourselves and encourages one to think otherwise or to do something about it. It is a self-help book that is becoming increasingly popular. Read it.


That’s all I have for this week. I hope everyone enjoys Halloween, and has a great rest of the week. On to November!

Han

Wake Up Wednesday: 10.4

Good morning. I hope everyone has had a great week! We have enjoyed the dry weather, especially our farmers. The have been working like crazy to get as much crop out as possible because rain is in the forecast again.

Rain, rain, go away…..

I don’t think I have anymore announcements for today.

Grab that cup of caffeine, and let’s get this morning off to a good start.


Song of the Week:

Drunk Me

Mitchell Tenpenny

This song is just a good jammer. Turn it up and get going down that road.

What color annoys you when you see it?:

Purple

But I cannot exactly explain why. I don’t have a reason other than I just really dislike the color purple. And I hate when people match purple and green – maybe it’s because I watched Barney on the daily when I was younger.

Bible Verse of the Week:

I am a CHILD of GOD.

1 John 3:1

This verse is so simple, but enough. Those six words are enough to keep me hoping.

Have you ever taken part in a parade?:

Honestly, I was involved in a lot of parades in my hometown area throughout my whole life whether it be for dance, riding the fire truck, or representing something or someone.

I was also nominated my senior year of high school to be an All-American Cheerleader. With that nomination, I was honored to represent the United States of America in the world’s largest parade – New Year’s Day Parade in London, United Kingdom. I spent a few months preparing the routine at home and a week in London with a hundred other gals from all over the US.

 

Quote of the Week:

Though we run, and distract, and try to fill ourselves with anything and everything that slightly resembles hope – the only place we can truly find it is in His arms.

-Marisa Donnelly

This talented gal is a gal I went to college with. She is one of the most inspirational writers I have read. She has a mind of maturity and a heart of gold. Look her up, she has published writings with similar quotes and poetry.

If you were on the run from law enforcement what country would you flee to?:

I wouldn’t go far. I would go to Canada. I have been there, and I think it would be fun to live there. Now under a warrant in a different country, I don’t know if I’d like to be wanted. But I’d go to Canada.

If you discovered a new species of dinosaur what would you call it?:

I am pretty sure I am a new species of dinosaur some days. I call myself the –

HANASAURUS

She bite your head off and then give it back to you nicely after she eats or after she realizes she didn’t need to bite it off in the first place. Ha. Every now and then, this happens, but she generally always gives your head back without too many bite marks.


Something short and sweet today, but we are awake, and we couldn’t ask for more. Do something fun this week while the sun is still shining.

Have a great week!

Han

Wake Up Wednesday: 10.3

Good afternoon – we are getting earlier in the day. Maybe next week we will post before noon! Well the sunshine is back and it’s crazy how much better of a mood people are in with the sun shines. Hopefully it is here to stay for a while as well as the temperatures – the snow this week was a bit much.

Harvest is back in full swing, and again, I hope we have the weather to complete it! Prayers to all of our farmers, farm hands, and farmer’s wives and their families.

Alright, grab your cup of joe and let’s go!


Song of the Week:

Shallow ( A Star is Born – movie)

-Lady Gaga & Bradley Cooper

I have yet to see this movie, but I will be seeing it soon. I hear it is a great movie that portrays Lady Gaga in a very different light than what a lot of us are used to. This song is a great song as well as the whole soundtrack.

What is your favorite way to start your day?:

Coffee – Breakfast – GMA – Shower Coffee (yes, you read that right. Don’t judge me, there are plenty of people who have shower beers. Well I have shower coffees as well.) #noshame

What particular field of study were you really interested in, but decided not to pursue?:

Gerontology – the study of the elderly population

I took a few classes on gerontology in my undergrad at Iowa State University, and after the first, I contemplated completing a second major or even a minor in this field. It is so interesting to see the way things have changed for the care of our elderly even in the last 15 years and what individuals can and cannot do now to assist. I have a special place in my heart for the elderly, and honestly, since high school, I have always thought I would find myself in a career assisting that age of population.

Bible Verse of the Week:

“Coming to Him, a living stone — rejected by men but chosen and valuable to God–“

1 Peter 2:4

Would you rather ask for permission or apologize later?:

Ask me this 5 years ago, I would have told you to ask for permission.

Ask me now, I would tell anyone to apologize later.

Take the risk. Just do something. If you don’t do something, nothing will change. And maybe it’s not change you are seeking, but once you start making decisions based on this, change will happen no matter what.

Quote of the Week:

“You are allowed to be both a masterpiece and a work in progress simultaneously.”

-Sophia Bush

Let this just sink in.

What is the best thing about being in a relationship?:

To me, the best part of being in a relationship is sharing your life with someone who enjoys sharing their life with you.

I love to travel, but I love to travel more with my husband. I love to eat popcorn and watch movies, but I love to do those things with him too.

Sharing your life isn’t always about the good, but also sharing the bad. It is a forever support system. Relationships are not always 50/50, but instead, they might be 80/20 sometimes. It is nice to have someone there to pick you up or bring up your slack when you are down. You still remain whole.


That is all I have for this week. I hope everyone enjoys their week, and our farmers can get a good jump on harvest.

Han

Good Night Wednesday: 10.2

Alright, well, my body is a day behind. I thought it was Tuesday today, so instead of waking up with me. Let’s finish our day together. I apologize for not being on top of it.

It has been a rainy week so harvest has been put on hold until that sun comes out for more than an hour. We could use about 25 days of sunshine in a row; that would really help everyone out.

So unless you work the night shift and need a coffee drink, lets grab a glass of wine tonight – or a brewski.


Song of the Week:

Alone

-Sara Evans

This song was introduced to me by a great friend. I let her sing it to me on the road home one day. It has a lot of truth to it. I think a lot of us sacrifice or have sacrificed the love of someone because we thought they were better off. Roles reversed, you might just need to be left alone to get over or move on; maybe you would be better off left alone. This is a good song.

What embarrasses you instantly?:

Honestly, it takes a lot to embarrass me. I grew up with a VERY out-going, supportive mother. She was the queen of embarrassing her children, whether it be yelling during a sporting event or forming a surprise momma’s lip sync group during homecoming. I learned to embrace my mother’s grade-A embarrassing behavior in high school. The funny thing is I am very much like my mother and I think that’s a little embarrassing for her sometimes. Ha.

One thing that embarrasses me on the spot is when someone walks into my house and it isn’t picked up or clean. When I was younger, I never understood why my mother would stress the importance of a clean house or leave us with chores to do if people were expected. (Mom, I’m so sorry for resisting to help you clean. I am sorry I never kept my room clean. I get it now.) 

Bible Verse of the Week:

What is your favorite non-alcoholic drink?:

Arnold Palmer (half tea/ half lemonade)

I loved this drink before it came in a can. But now that it does, I get one 90% of the time I stop at a convenient store. It’s a bonus that they are only $0.99, and they are tall-boys!

Quote of the Week:

“If we’re going to talk, then let’s talk. Forget about what is polite or proper and delve right into what is sincere and honest. Lead me down through the labyrinth of your true, spectacular self. I am not interested in pleasantries. If you want a conversation, then let’s get lost.”

-Beau Taplin

This is how we should really enter into every conversation. Sometimes I find myself in situations in which I should be a little more conservative or reserved. That doesn’t mean I come off as someone else, but I just don’t allow myself to be as blunt or forthcoming as I maybe would be with my family or best friends. I think a lot of people find themselves in similar situations on a regular basis. If you have to tone it down, tone it down, but don’t be fake or someone you’re not.

What sound relaxes you?:

My favorite sound is rain. On the windows, on the roof, or even just the playing of rain on a noise maker – these all are worth staying in bed and watching movies all day for.

Although I love the sound of rain, I am ready for the sun to shine for a while. We have had a lot of rain the last couple months.

If you joined a circus what kind of performer would you be?:

I would be the ticket taker. Ha.

Circus’ are great don’t get me wrong, but again, I don’t feel any desire to swing from the rafters or tame lions. Why put yourself in those situations? I also think I am a personable person, I could be a good greeter.


This is all I have for tonight. Again, sorry about the late post!

I hope everyone has a great rest of the week and weekend! Pray for sunshine!

Hannah

October 7, 2017

One Year Ago Today: I woke up with overwhelming emotions of happiness, excitement, and fear of the unknown. Today was going to be a good day; it had to be, it was the 7th – 7 is my lucky number.

Those positive emotions took a quick turn for the worse when the screen showed a sight neither my husband nor I thought we’d ever have to face.

Our lives were forever changed that day, just not in the way we had hoped.


Two lines were all we knew of you. But when we saw those two lines, nothing we had planned for our first year of marriage mattered more than bringing a little one into this world.

We weren’t expecting to get pregnant right away. When we did, I tried my damnedest to see the silver lining through a diagnosis from a couple of years past. That diagnosis brought about a very realistic view of the pregnancy and stood in the way of a more positive mindset. All I could do was pray and pray for a healthy baby. On this day, one year ago, was our first ultrasound appointment. I was nervous, excited, scared, and full of any other emotions one could feel at one time.


Back Story: A few years ago, what I thought was an ovarian cyst made out for an additional diagnosis of a septate uterus, or a bicornuate uterus. That was all I needed to remove myself and my mindset from the  decreased possibility of ever having children. Recurrent miscarriages, pre-term births or delivery, the inability to reach full term pregnancy – all of these were associated with my diagnosis. My thoughts brought me back to, “I will cross this bridge when I get to it. God gave me this body, and did I want to manually adjust what He had made?” Remember this verse Han?

Little did I know, this bridge would come about a lot sooner than I had once thought it would. I knew surgery to remove the septum in my uterus would immensely increase my chances of successful pregnancies and having children, but I was still so hesitant. I prayed and prayed for guidance in making that decision.


Our eyes were fixed on the ultrasound screen unaware of what we were or weren’t looking at, but I knew it wasn’t what the doctors were hoping for. I can remember the look on my doctor’s face and the quiet, empathetic tone of her voice when she told us the baby wasn’t developing and growing as he/she should. She then gave us our options and recommendations on the decision we had to make now and for any corrective surgery in the near future.

From that moment on, the next 24 hours happened so fast. That appointment led to an immediate D&C (Dilation and Curettage) early the following morning. I didn’t give myself enough time to process what exactly had happened and what was going to happen.

The next morning, my husband and I made our way to the hospital for pre-op check-in before sunrise. I was an emotional wreck the whole hour ride, but I internalized these feelings and emotions. Thoughts flashed in and out of my head; “surely there are a lot of women who go through or have been through this. I should just be thankful I could get pregnant,” I thought to myself. I knew I wasn’t the only one. I had to be strong for myself, for my husband, and for my family.

It wasn’t until one of the nurses brought in consent forms and went through the procedure details that I fully understood what was going to happen. Right there on the paper was the word “abortion”.

In that moment, I have never felt more awful about myself, about my life, about my marriage, or about this baby. As naive as it sounds, I had never once thought about the procedure details.

As I signed my name to go forth with the procedure, the tears began rolling down my face. I had never felt so alone, and the sad part was that my husband, my support system, my best friend, was sitting right next to me the whole entire time holding my hand. So why did I feel this way? Why did I feel so alone?

The days and weeks of recovery went on, and I still thought and prayed about the what if’s. Sitting in a waiting room full of pregnant women and moms with their children of all ages for follow-up appointments got harder and harder. As the pain and soreness faded, my thoughts and emotions did not.

Miscarriage – no matter how far along, doesn’t make it any easier.

I leaned on my Lord, prayed for understanding, and asked for guidance. I knew his plans would prevail, but that didn’t mean it didn’t hurt. It doesn’t mean that I don’t think and pray every single day for that little one.


This week is the first time I feel comfortable sharing, the first time I feel ready to show the world that it’s okay to share your journey if you want, with who you want, and when you want. I didn’t share a lot of my real feelings following the miscarriage. Because of the “12 week rule,” I hadn’t told anyone but my mom and employer about the pregnancy. We actually lied to people when they asked why I had surgery because I didn’t want people to know that we had lost a baby.

[The 12 week “rule” – the suggested amount of time one should wait during a pregnancy to inform others of your exciting news. This rule isn’t necessarily a rule you absolutely have to follow, but there is a stigma attached to the “rule”.]

But here’s the thing, miscarriages don’t just happen in the first twelve weeks, they can happen at any point during a pregnancy, and unfortunately, a loss can also follow the birth of the baby. So what I’m saying is that 12 weeks is just a number. To hell with the stigmas around how you should and shouldn’t go forth with your pregnancy.

I put on a strong front because there are too many women who have been through this, and they were “fine,” right? The truth is, they may not be “fine”, they are changed.

So tell who you want, so share your every emotion. It is not worth being or feeling alone. Give up the 100-year-old stigma of keeping miscarriages a secret; give up the 12 week rule if you want. It doesn’t make you any less pregnant or less of a woman or a mother. Your mental health and your support systems are necessary to get through something so raw and real. All I wanted was to lean on someone, I just didn’t want them to minimize my feelings or tell me how to feel.

One of my biggest support systems was the good Lord and His word. I understood that His plan was better than anything I could ever muster up in my head. I believe that God walks with us through the lowest of lows so that we see for ourselves that even when we feel alone, He is still with us.

But He says,

That was all I needed to give me hope.


Prayers to all of you who have been or are along a similar journey as well as to those of you who are struggling with infertility. My heart goes out to you all and I pray for you daily. Just remember, you are never alone.

XOXO

Hannah

 

Wake Up Wednesday: 10.1

Good morning. Well that was a fast week, and it is a new month! I feel like I say this every month, but dang, this year is going by quickly. And although this is my favorite time of year, we could use about 25 days of strictly sunshine to finish up with harvest.

For those of you who enjoyed the 13 days of Halloween on TV, it is now 31 days, so please indulge in your favorite Halloween shows every day this month!

Alright, let’s get this show on the road. Grab your caffeinated drink and read on.


Song of the Week:

Head Above Water

-Avril Lavigne

Avril has been one of my all-time favorite artists since I was very young. Her music was relatable and all I wanted to rock out to for quite some time. She hasn’t put out a new album for a while, but this is a new single she recently released.

This song takes a new meaning in my life right now. As many of you know bringing a new baby home is an adjustment to say the least, and a lot of times it can bring about a lot of doubts. Sometimes you just need to get through the day.

Take a listen, it’s a great song.

Have you ever been scuba diving?:

No I have never been, but I don’t have any desire to swim in the waters with sharks, sting rays, or any other animals of that sort. Just like with sky diving, I don’t understand why people would purposely put themselves in a potentially dangerous situation. Just keep two feet on the ground.

I do not keep myself from doing things I want to do for reasons of fear. I just have never cared to do those things.

What is your most-used word?:

I am such a mid-westerner. I NEVER thought about the words I say or how much I say them until everyone started making a big deal out of mid-westerners say “ope”.

I’m trying to be a little more conscious about it, but this word comes out of my mouth so much, it’s not even funny. I also can’t deny my ranch-loving mid-westerner trait either. I might as well embrace it. Ha.

Bible Verse of the Week:

What is one of your biggest pet peeves?:

I have many, so don’t be surprised if you see this question pop up again in the future. 

One of my biggest pet peeves is when I am told by friends or family to tell a story or reflect on a memory from the past and I am interrupted in the middle by someone correcting me on minute details.

—Okay, if you want me to tell everyone this story, don’t correct me on the small details that don’t necessarily matter. Or just tell them yourself. And maybe it’s my fault for even putting those details in the story in the first place, but what’s a story without the details?

Quote of the Week: 

What is the deepest root of your joy: what God gives you? or what God is for you? 

-John Piper

Food for thought. That’s all I’m going to say on this one.

If you could go back to your teenage self, what two words would you say to her?:

Do It! 

I was very reserved as a teenager as far as trying new things or being adventurous for fear of disappointing my mom or getting in trouble.

Honestly, if I would have known what I know now, I would have done things a lot differently. I try to incorporate that into my life now, but responsibilities as an adult far outweigh any responsibility I ever had as a teenager.

I would have lived more by the saying, “it’s better to ask for forgiveness than permission”.


Well that’s all I have for this morning. I hope everyone has a great rest of the week/weekend. I pray for a smooth and safe harvest.

Han